I received a call yesterday from a client’s daughter, Mary, whom I have been working closely with.

Mary was concerned.

She lives in another state. Her brother has been doing some of the caretaking for their mother, who lives nearby.

But her brother is feeling too busy and stressed to continue caring for their mother. On top of that, Mary and her brother have different ideas about how their mother’s care should be carried out.

Mary wondered if she should have her mother come live with her, so she can care for her more. She’s finding it too difficult to manage her mother’s care long-distance.

Often when someone is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, there’s a family member around who either by choice or by default becomes a primary caregiver.

But what should you do if your family is spread across the country? What’s best for your loved one if there’s no one nearby who can really help out in the early stages, like Mary?

If your loved one is still lucid and can make — or at least be involved in — her own decisions, discuss this situation with her.

You may want to go to where she lives and talk face to face. While you are there, you will have the perfect opportunity to assess her home situation and determine if you are comfortable with her living there alone.

You can also determine if she could live alone for the time being with assistance from in-home care.

At that point, you can contact a geriatric care manager to look after her in your absence. If this is not feasible or comfortable for you, you may want to look at facilities in her area. Talk with a social service agency in the area she lives to find these resources.

Even if your loved one goes to a facility, you can hire a geriatric care manager to visit her on a regular basis and report back to you. The manager would act as a liaison for you and also as an advocate for your mother to ensure she is getting proper care.

If you still are not comfortable with the situation, discuss moving her close to you.

Decide whether she would live with you or in a facility near you.

If she were to live with you, would she need supervision, or would she be safe alone while you work? If supervision is needed, contact a social service agency to get a list of resources in your area.

In-home care is also an option.

Adult daycare is another, if you have a center in your area. Daycare services include supervision, meals, activities, and socialization. Some provide nursing services. This option would mean she would leave your home and go to a center each day. This could be arranged through the center’s transportation service, if offered, through specialized public transportation, or you could take her and pick her up on your trips to and from work.

If your loved one is at an early enough stage, she can help organize the activities with the staff at the day care, and then naturally transition to more of a participatory role as her disease progresses.

I discussed all this with Mary. “When you talk or visit with your mom, you will get an idea what environment is best for her. Think through your options; run them past a trusted friend. Then make a decision.”

Mary felt much better about it. We even brought her brother into the discussion, and together they decided what was best for their mom.

Issues like these are just part of what we help families work through every day at my law office.

We provide our clients a free phone consultation. If you would like to find out more about how to get help working through the issues that many families face when someone is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, feel free to contact me at (913) 338-5713.

If we cannot help you, we’ll direct you to resources that can. The call is free; don’t miss this opportunity to gain valuable insight.

Who will make the tough decisions for you when you no longer can?

In this post, I want to look at the difference between a power of attorney and a guardianship.

How do those affect you?

In the case that you or a loved one become incapacitated and can no longer make decisions on your own, this can effect you very deeply.

Let me explain.

Powers of attorney for health care and property/financial decisions are a relatively low cost way to decide which family member or trusted friend will have the legal authority to carry out your wishes, if you can no longer speak or act for yourself.

* * *

Terri Schiavo’s http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terri_Schiavo name was splashed across headlines for years for exactly this reason.

Terri didn’t have a power of attorney designating who she wanted to make healthcare decisions for her in the event she wasn’t able to make them herself.

Her parents and husband waged war through years of legal battles… not to mention heartbreak, tears, and hard feelings.

While this is not as common for a young person (which is why Terri was prevalent in the papers), it is often the case that as we age, one obstruction or another keeps us from making decisions for ourselves. Alzheimer’s is one such obstruction.

I have seen families torn to shreds over the healthcare decisions of a loved one.

Don’t let your family be destroyed because you simply didn’t make your wishes known, or appoint someone to make those tough decisions for you.

* * *

If you do not have power of attorney, or if your powers of attorney are not drafted properly and something happens that results in your inability to make decisions, your loved ones may later face costly court proceedings and court-supervised guardianship and/or conservatorship.

A court proceeding is not only expensive, but the person appointed as your guardian/conservator may not be the person whom you would have chosen yourself.

Here’s what you must know: too many people are forced into a situation where a complete stranger is making life and death decisions on their behalf.

Sometimes those decisions are what the person would have wanted, and other times, though the guardian tries, decisions are made that are completely the opposite.

Would you want that for your loved one?

If not, then a power of attorney might be right for you.

To find out more about powers of attorney and guardianships, open your “Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Alzheimer’s But Were Afraid to Ask – Answers to Over 92 of the Most Frequently Asked Questions at the Alzheimer’s Resource Center” booklets and read items 95 to 96.

www.AlzheimersResourceKit.com/hammond/resources/everythingaboutalz.html

Don’t let your healthcare wishes be a mystery to your loved ones. Make them known.

Over the next 6 weeks, I’m releasing my most valuable gems about how to get help paying for nursing home care and one new secret about where to get help and the kind of dangers you might encounter if you do nothing.

Why?

Because I want to help you know where you can find help, and what mistakes to avoid.

I want to make sure that even if you’ve already unknowingly made a “mistake,” there may be things you can do to keep from experiencing huge penalties.

To get an email with each new installment, go to www.LearnMedicaid.com/hammond to enter your name and email. You don’t want to miss out.

- Day 1: You’ll begin to discover how NOT to go totally broke when you have long term care costs.
- Day 1, part 2: 7 Secrets to Surviving Medicaid Spend Down… and what it means for you
- Day 2: When Medicare no longer cares for you… and it’s sooner than almost all seniors think!

I challenge you to take my ecourse, “Don’t Go Broke in a Nursing Home” so that you and your loved one don’t end up unnecessarily out of money and out of options.

On the first day of my series, today, I’m filling you in on how to keep from making 3 Big Money Mistakes that many seniors unknowingly make! Click below to sign up:

www.learnmedicaid.com/hammond

Over the next 6 weeks, I’m releasing my most valuable gems about how to get help paying for nursing home care. One new secret about where to get help and the kind of dangers you might encounter if you do nothing.

Why?

Because I want to help you know where you can find help, and what mistakes to avoid.

I want to make sure that even if you’ve already unknowingly made a “mistake,” there may be things you can do to keep from experiencing huge penalties.

To get an email with each new installment, go to www.LearnMedicaid.com/hammond to enter your name and email. You don’t want to miss out.

- Day 1: You’ll begin to discover how NOT to go totally broke when you have long term care costs.
- Day 1, part 2: 7 Secrets to Surviving Medicaid Spend Down… and what it means for you
- Day 2: When Medicare no longer cares for you… and it’s sooner than almost all seniors think!

I challenge you to take my ecourse, “Don’t Go Broke in a Nursing Home” so that you and your loved one don’t end up unnecessarily out of money and out of options.

On the first day of my series, today, I’m filling you in on how to keep from making 3 Big Money Mistakes that many seniors unknowingly make! Click below to sign up:

www.learnmedicaid.com/hammond

One of the most rewarding aspects of my work and service is learning about extraordinary experts who can help our clientele. They just genuinely care about helping caregivers.

One such extraordinary person is Jo “Hurricane” Huey, who has worked in every capacity as a caregiver.

She started out giving individual care to seniors with dementia. She eventually headed several different facilities.

Jo also cared for her own mother, who had vascular dementia (a disease with symptoms and care strategies that parallel Alzheimer’s).

Because of her many years working in every capacity of Alzheimer’s care, Jo created the 10 Absolutes of Alzheimer’s Caregiving.

Her main goal is to help caregivers do the best they can, while taking care of themselves at the same time.

By clicking the following link, you’ll find an MP3 recording entitled “Preserving Your Mental, Emotional, Physical and Psychological Health as a Caregiver.” Many of my clients have found the information in this interview with Jo to be life-changing and refreshing for them.

I’ve arranged to get the audio interview for you. If you listen closely, you’ll discover the following valuable insights:

- 8 new methods to keep from dangerously overburdening yourself. These new methods eliminate stress which accompanies Alzheimer’s caregiving. Without these secret stress reducers you could dangerously overburden yourself and cause yourself health issues.
- 4 simple activities to reverse caregiver burnout
- Most caregivers don’t know it, but caregivers have a much higher rate of illness and are 63% more likely to die than non-caregivers. In the MP3, you’ll find out one simple, effective way to prevent this that hardly anyone knows about.

To get the free MP3 audio now, visit:
www.AlzheimersResourceKit.com/hammond/resources/preserving.html

This is not the kind of material you’ll hear anywhere else.

To help you reduce your chances of financial loss, and maintain quality of life for you and your loved one when a long-term care facility looms, The Elder and Disability Law Firm has developed a Family Savings and Protection Consultation for Alzheimer’s families.

One of our top team members will conduct this free consultation over the telephone with you. We have found this to be the most efficient and private means of informing you of your options.

We realize the laws are complicated, confusing, and constantly changing. We provide this free consultation to help ensure you and your loved one an easier and more enjoyable future. The sooner you begin planning, the less of your money will be lost to the costs of this terrible disease. This means planning ahead is critically important.

What we accomplish in this free, zero-nonsense consultation session is:

- Help you determine the legal structures that can protect your family’s savings while there’s still time.
- Demonstrate how you can safely (without penalty) set aside money so your loved one can have funds available for a better quality of life.
- How to protect your loved one from being penalized for common mistakes they didn’t even know they were making.

The session is conducted by one of the top experts in our company, who has worked with hundreds of families to set up legal structures that protect the families’ savings and allow for a better, less stressful, quality of life.

Please be assured that this consultation will not be a thinly disguised sales presentation; it will consist only of expert guidance provided by my firm.

To secure a convenient time for this consultation, please call my office at (913) 338-5713. We will advise you as to the available time slots for your free personalized and confidential consultation.

We look forward to speaking with you soon.